“Do not ever erase those identifiers that are held in you…it was given to you at birth and it is yours to own.” —Uzoamaka Aduba

I have a European first name and a Nigerian middle and last name. For most of my adolescence I dreaded telling people my middle name

It’s not even that my Nigerian names are hard to pronounce, because they really aren’t (although people have found a way to butcher their pronunciation many times). I guess I grew up partly ashamed of my Nigerian heritage, and partly afraid that kids with the standard names would mispronounce and judge mine for being “not normal.”

When teachers would take roll call, I would quickly say “Present!” before they attempted to butcher my middle and last name. At awards ceremonies, I would tell the announcer beforehand to not bother saying my Nigerian middle name. For some reason I was afraid the predominantly White crowd would judge me as “that Black kid with the weird name.”

Luckily I’ve left those days of fear and self-loathing in the past, but I was reminded of those times in a recent conversation with a friend about ethnic names.

My friend is from China; he has a Chinese name. Here in America, though, he goes by a European name. We’ve been friends for almost four years, but we both didn’t know each other’s ethnic names; we only knew each other’s European names. So we told each other our names.

His reaction when I told him my Nigerian name was not what I expected. He loved it.

“I’m going to change your name in my Contacts,” he said. “It sounds way doper than your first name.”

I smiled. “Thanks. No one’s ever preferred my Nigerian name over my European name.”

“There’s nothing wrong with European names,” he responded. “It’s just that like almost everyone here already has a European name. In a diverse country like America, it’s always dope learning people’s ethnic names. They’re unique.”

Maybe it was because he understood what it’s like having an “ethnic-sounding” name in a Eurocentric world, but regardless, I was pleasantly surprised by his positive reaction.

“You should embrace your Nigerian name; it’s really dope.”

Considering that we live in a Eurocentric world, where people often reject their culture for fear that they will be ridiculed by the majority, and where a lot of parents are afraid to give their children ethnic names for fear of how society might treat them, my friend’s advice warmed my heart.

I’ve heard so many absolutely beautiful African and African-American names; it’s sad to see how society sometimes makes us feel ashamed of our cultures, and how racial bias against “ethnic-sounding” or “Black-sounding” names serves as yet another barrier to social progress and self-acceptance.

We don’t have to be ashamed of our cultures or try erasing who we are. Like my friend Tianjing said, let’s embrace our beautiful cultures and our beautiful names.